What will tomorrow bring….?

Much hilarity at work. Text from Sian at 10:30 this morning: ” MUM COREYS CUT MY FRINGE YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SORT IT OUT TONIGHT BEFORE I GO TO SCHOOL OMG MUMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!! ” Then 10:35: “IT’S NOT LIKE CUT SHORT BUT I HAVE A THICK FRINGE AND NOW ITS CUT STRAIGHT ACROSS!!!!! I REFUSE to look after him anymore I can’t do it! You’re going to have to like idk feather it out or whatever so it doesn’t look like it’s been cut across! It looks awful OMG!!” Back to school tomorrow thank goodness. 🙂

A bit happier than last night’s offering. But thanks to my second family, ie. the ‘lads’, they made me laugh so much today. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without them to make me smile on my darkest days. “What’ll we make today then Adzii?” “Show me your cock and balls. ;)” “Ok. :)” So they made me a pair of glass genitals, which had me crying with laughter to the point that the rest of the factory had to come round to see what I was laughing at. It wasn’t the juvenile subject matter that tickled me, but the fact that all of a sudden a big group of spectators came in which resulted in David ordering me, “For God’s sake Adele!! Shield me!! QUICK!!” :’D
Sometimes childish humour works wonders. Can’t wait to polish them up tomorrow. Bookends!! Always one for interior design oddities, me.. 🙂

Apart from that, (and the shouty capitals text from Sian) I was in a wittering mood. I’ve been quiet lately, and I just felt the need to talk. And talk….. In fact I didn’t shut up. Just about mundane stuff. I open up in the glasshouse. I have no idea why the men are so much easier to talk to than women. Maybe they are just being polite. But I can be myself in there, and they know I’m the only girl in there that doesn’t take any offence at any of their ‘bloke talk’. I join in happily. (I think I shock them sometimes..) Also worked alongside a new apprentice in process this morning. We have two new apprentices. Two young lads. Really enthusiastic, so far… But one is quite shocked at the heat from the machines in process!! Don’t think we’ll see him infront of the furnaces anytime soon! Speaking of which, they were bitey hot this afternoon. Sometimes I hardly notice the heat, other times I can actually feel my skin blistering. Today was one of those days. One of my “Extra-Long Kevlar Sleeve Days’. Only on stoppers too! But that means short irons. 🙂 Something else to make me smile was a glass bracelet I had made sold in the C-Art exhibition, and my main piece has attracted a lot of attention. I really don’t want that to sell though, even though it has a crazy price tag, I want to keep it for myself. Some artist, hey? Lol! 😀

But my happiest news today is the impending new car. Chose the car, the extras, the colour, ordered it, now have to wait. Possibly for weeks. And we all know that patience isn’t my strong point….

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Today has been a tough one. But an eye opener too. Nothing makes any sense. How can people who have shown nothing but love and kindness have their lives cut so tragically short? Is that fair? Rapists, murderers, etc… living until an old age, but someone so pure of heart being snatched away leaving emotional devastation behind? I could rant on and on because I feel incredibly bitter but I won’t. But also I won’t change my views on this. It seems it doesn’t matter how nice you are. I’ve always tried to be as lovely as I can be to people. I am there for everyone whenever I am needed. A lot of the ‘friends’ I run around after wouldn’t do the same for me, so now I have decided that I will only be there and do favours for those who would make the same effort for me. I am not wasting another second on those who don’t deserve my generosity, because my time is precious, and I will make time ONLY for those that matter. So. Anyone who has asked a favour of me lately, and there are a few, should ask themselves if they deserve it. If they have done for me as I have done for them. If the answer is no, then it looks like they lose. That is all I am going to say tonight.

Ends and Beginnings…?

It’s been an up/down sort of a week. Sadly we lost Nick’s aunt on Friday. She passed away peacefully, so at least she won’t be suffering anymore. It’s selfish to will someone to carry on living just because you know you will miss them so much. It’s still really hard to believe that she is gone, Nick is really sad, but we’ve laughed remembering funny stories. She stayed the strong, determined person she was, right until the end. I hope I have that strength and good humour when it is my time to go. My heart aches for Nick’s mum and remaining aunt. I just know her funeral will be a celebration of the amazing woman she was. There will be lots of tears and lots of laughter. But the real loss to the Clarks and Powells will be realised over time. Things will never be the same…. RIP Gaynor Powell, you will be missed more than you could ever imagine. 😦 xxx

All this has made us realise life is too short. You have to grab every opportunity that is thrown in your direction with both hands and run with it. So….as life goes on, a fantastic job opportunity has cropped up within Nick’s company that would he has been told he’d be perfect for. It is an astonishingly huge step up and he deserves it after all his hard work. The only thing is……. it’s in New Zealand. We laughed and brushed it to one side at first, but the more we talked about it, the more we realised that it is maybe time for a new start. As a family and as a couple. I love the idea of being where no one knows us. I relish the prospect of anonimity. Don’t get me wrong, I would miss our family and closest friends, but the ONLY thing that is bothering me is taking the kids away from their grandparents, plus Sian isn’t happy about it. That is something I need to consider more thoroughly. I’d even be prepared to give up my beloved job and Cornish dream, because I could just do my jewellery on my own somewhere else. In fact this could just be the kick up the backside I actually need! After a lot of pondering, I’ve told Nick to go for it. There. What will be will be. We’ve been looking at property and the area over there (NIck has already set his heart on a beautiful house) and I think I would be very happy. Apparently it’s like the UK 30 years ago! It seems quiet and tranquil, in fact it seems too perfect…. But it may not materialise yet so watch this space…. I like kiwis anyway. Cute fat little things. The birds obviously, not the folk I hasten to add…. 🙂

What would happen if……..?

Trying to stay strong despite tonights further bad news. I cannot bear to see my husband so down. It tears me apart. So after last night’s depressing post, I’ll talk about something positive. Like Corey’s spin on things. There’s too much negativity around here right now. Corey gives an ‘alternative’ view. I’m sitting listening to Corey talking to Nick about death… “What happens when you die?”
“You go to heaven.”
 “Will Aunty Gay go to Heaven?”
“Yes, of course she will, Corey.”
“Ok. That means I won’t see her when I die, because I’ll be going to Hell.”
Said so matter-of-factly, like he has resigned himself to this fact, so there is no point in him even ATTEMPTING to be good. Once Corey sets off on this topic there is no stopping him, so I am just keeping out of it before even I start to question what happens in the afterlife. I hate it when he asks questions I have no answer for. Questions, questions, questions. He follows you around asking an endless stream of questions. After a while, Nick deals with it in the only way possible, “COREY!! WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP!!” He makes me laugh though. I sat him down before we went to Manchester and explained about his aunty’s illness and how unwell she was and needed quiet. I gave him a list of things he wasn’t to mention because he isn’t the most tactful child in the world, so he asked if he was allowed to ask her how she was. I said yes, that’s fine, and he was actually really sweet. He even managed to have her playing Angry Birds which he was quite chuffed about. (See, still trying to please despite how uncomfortable she was,) we stayed most of the afternoon with her, and as we said our sad goodbyes, Corey suddenly remembered: “So Aunty Gay. How are you feeling?” Such a little sweetheart.
My little man can turn the darkest day, blue. I know he drives me completely bonkers, but I wouldn’t want him any other way. Even when I have to turn my music up in my car to drown out the incessant questions about everything coming from the back seat! Tonight on my way back from Asda it was about teeth and dental procedures. Not my favourite subject. 😦 “What would happen if I pulled out my molars? If I have a cavity, will it get bigger everytime I eat a sweet? How do dentists pull out teeth? Would it hurt if you didn’t have an injection? How many teeth have I got? Count them.”
“I don’t know, Corey, I’m driving.” 
“Then look in the mirror on the windscreen at me!”  
His favourite recurring questions at the moment are, “What’s in this bottle? Would it kill me if I drank it? How would I die? What’s this? Would it kill me if I ate it? What about if I ate some glass? Would it make me bleed in my tummy? What would happen if I accidently ate some soap?” When you are being followed round the house with this endless interrogation, it can be quite alarming. Corey is the sort of kid to try something out just to see for himself!

Anyway. Since I know he has been playing with caterpillars tonight out with his friends, it may be wise for me to now do a quick sweep search of the house before bed. I don’t want any creepy-crawlie visitors during the night!

A little sad. :(

“It’s not fair.” I say that when I have a bad firing, when I break a piece I have worked for hours on, when Nick puts his foot down to one of my crazy hairbrained ideas, etc…… But hearing that same phrase from a wonderful, kind, loving person who has never said a bad word about anyone, nor even raised their voice, been utterly devoted to their family, really got to me. This person is Nick’s beloved aunt and has sadly been given days to weeks to live. Now THAT, is NOT fair. In fact it could possibly be the biggest understatement ever. She is the most undeserving person in the world for this prognosis. Heartbreaking. We reminisced on Saturday, holding her hand in her little room in a Manchester hospital. About when his whole family all met me for the first time. They all welcomed me into their family from day one and they all became my ‘adoptive’ aunts, uncle, gran…. “You looked like a mermaid with your flowing long blonde hair. Gran (now sadly deceased earlier this year) picked you out for Nick straight away. We still talk about that now.” Yes. I remember that night like yesterday. I was very slim back then, about 16 years ago nearly to the day, with blonde hair that nearly reached my backside, and I was painfully shy because the night in question was Nick’s sister’s wedding and we had only been seeing each other for about two weeks, so I had an awful lot of family to be introduced to. (In fact, unbeknown to me, I was already expecting Sian!) I didn’t realise back then that they were to become MY family two years later, although I think even if I hadn’t actually married Nick, I would have still loved them all as much. But they are just the sweetest. They aren’t just an ‘ordinary’ family. They are the family that EVERYONE wants to be a part of, and I am one of the lucky ones to have married into such love and laughter. So this has sent horrific shockwaves to the family’s core. “This is NOT my finest hour, Adele,” she said whilst holding my hand. “No,” I replied, “You’ve had better ones. As far as adventures go, you could have at least picked something a little more fun.” I don’t deal with mortality and illness very well. I just don’t DO ill myself, I am a perpetual ignorer of abnormal symptoms, so this has made me determined to take my own health more seriously. It’s so hard though. What do you say to someone in that situation? “Hey, when you get better, we’ll have to do this….” ?? Where the hell is the justice? Someone who doesn’t smoke, drink, live an unhealthy lifestyle of any description, is just 100% lovely…. If I could swap places with her, I would. At least I could rationalise that. I just keep tight hold of Nick because I see his pain. My hugs are all the comfort I have to offer to him, because no words can make things easier. But for as long as we can, we will be there every minute we are able, being the daft, soft couple we are, to make her laugh ’til the end.

I’m Back!!! :)

I’m a blondie again!! WOOHOO!!!! 🙂

Hey!! I’m finally back. In fact I’d completely forgotten I had this blog. Haven’t actually had a laptop for ages and ages, not that I’d missed it. I was actually really happy without one. It’s so easy to see why people become so dependent on them though, but me? Nah. Send me back to a time before technology and I’d be just dandy. 🙂 Hope this one packs in soon too. It was Nick’s fault. “I’m buying you a new laptop.” “But I don’t NEED one, babe,”  but once he’s made up his mind there’s no going back. Hence I have found my blog again. Wish I hadn’t though….Gosh I was a grumpy moo! Well, it was during my painful era. Unbeknown to me I needed my gallbladder whipping out and eventually I got worse and worse (and nowtier and nowtier,) until I ended up with pancreatitis. Not one of my finest moments, but for my sins I had to take more time off work that I would have liked. Serves me right for ignoring my pain and putting it down to indigestion!! But YAY!!! Back to full health and everything is FULL STEAM AHEAD!!! 🙂

Sooooo, news. News, news, news. Where do I start? Where did I leave off…?  Basically my jewellery sold. Well, the huge majority of it. 🙂 I am selling through Cumbria Crystal still, and via people contacting me through my website. I have a steady stream of orders, and some regular customers who love the fact I can make something special as a personal gift. I think I’ve discovered a ‘niche’ thanks to ONE particular collection that I can’t make enough of. 🙂 My clear and red hearts. To be honest I don’t find it very challenging, or even particularly unique, but they are fun to make, look cute, and are a massive seller. Especially for weddings. At the moment I am working flat out just to keep Cumbria Crystal stocked up, so other shops and galleries despite having several offers, are frustratingly, out of the question at the minute. I’m not even chasing any. I didn’t bank on selling so many! I know I’m going to need an assistant in the VERY near future, but I’m so reluctant to let anyone else in right now. The only person I would trust is Nick, but he is crazy busy with his own job. SO many friends and colleagues have offered their help, but I am so damn protective over it!! It’s bad enough losing a piece to a customer! Evenings and weekends have been my jewellery time, since I’ve been put in the glasshouse full-time, that is my only free time. I quite like that though. Coming home from work, sorting out tea and rushing back out to the workshop is therapeutic in a weird kind of way… Then more often than not, I’ll get caught by my boss, who then proceeds in a lecture about me running my self ragged and looking tired! I also have an exciting new project which I am working on for the C-Art exhibitions. I decided to go back to my roots and finish what I started at uni. It has been the most amazing experience to be able to pick up where I left off, but with the finest quality crystal this time, compared to the rubbish that was in the furnaces at uni. It is all being kept under wraps until the last minute, but I am just in seventh heaven with this project!! This is going to contain so much of me, my personality, my passion, and I am putting 110% into it! I am aiming for absolute perfection and I won’t settle for a fraction less. I know the importance of this… But, all will be revealed in about 3 weeks time… 😉

STILL loving working as a full-time glassmaker at Cumbria Crystal. To watch the way the company has developed over the last few months has been inspiring beyond words. We have been involved in some really high profile projects, been in the press numerous times and basically marketed and rebranded ourselves to the same standard as other companies dominating the highest class, luxury market, with a client list to match. Our name is now up there with the best of the best. Not bad for our little factory in our little town, eh? I have never, ever felt so honoured to work for Cumbria Crystal as I do at the moment. Things are going up and up and in our current economic climate, we are actually thriving. (OK. Must stop gushing…)

Anyway. I don’t want to go on, and on about glass, because I will try and keep writing updates. So. Personal stuff….
Well, I’m happy. 🙂 Actually, I’ve not felt this happy for at least a good five years or more. These past couple of months, everything has just clicked. Health, love, family, work…… all perfect. I’m a much calmer Adele than the one who was ranting on here about a year ago. I still have odd manic episodes when my brain just ends up so overloaded with erm… stuff, that I can’t organise it in any rational manner, and it usually just explodes in a crazy, chaotic, blonde (because I’m blonde again, see above) tornadoey thing that just can’t sit down, keep still, sleep or just behave in anything resembling normal behaviour. My ‘Adele Moments.’ 🙂  I’ve also signed up for the gym!!! I’ll fit it in somewhere, I have to!! I’m only doing 3 nights a week at the start, but it will mean going into work later on in the evening, unless I just stay behind for an extra hour or so at 4.30pm… I can’t wait!! With that, canoeing and mountain-biking, we’re becoming quite a fit family!! 🙂

Kids are still driving me mad, (summer hols) but they really are the best kids in the world. I’m not being biased, they really are two of the most unique, amazing kids I have ever known. Corey is just Corey. That child is too smart for his own good. The way he thinks things through is just so unlike other 7 year olds. Only Corey would think to hold a yard sale instead of tidying his room. Only Corey would create an animal park in the garden with bugs in takeaway boxes, then go down the road knocking on the neighbours’ doors and charging them to come and see it. Only Corey would fake a broken ankle and end up in X-ray at about 11.00pm after a four hour wait in A&E just for the adventure. Everywhere I go, people know him and come up to say “Hi”. Villagers come up to tell me stories of his ‘hilarious’ exploits, which usually have me cringing. He’s basically the local celebrity. Have you heard of Horrid Henry? We have Naughty Corey. The number of people who tell me I should write a book about him…. Then Sian. Sian who has grown up into a highly intelligent, intellectual, stylish, beautiful young woman. She gets stopped when she’s out in town by total strangers who just want to tell her how amazing she looks. She is gorgeous though. On our recent holiday in France, even the locals would stop her in the street. A few thought she was American!! 😀 She looks like a film star and we felt like her entourage!! Sian’s about to start her final year at school and later this month has to collect her first lot of GCSE results. She’s a straight A student, so I’m not worried. Also managed to bag the elusive Student Leader title for September, which we found out about whilst in France. I think my proudest moment of her this year though, is when she completed the Keswick to Barrow for her second year running. One more and she she gets a ‘doctorate.’ 🙂

And finally Nick. My amazing, gorgeous, supportive, generous, loving hubby. Five crappy years behind us, a lifetime of happiness and laughter ahead. No one knows me like Nick does. I am in constant awe of him, every single day he does something to make me love him more. He makes me laugh like no other, and I just look forward to seeing him at the end of every day. I still get butterflies when I hear the front door open. He’s the epitomy of the perfect man. Amazing husband and dad, the cleverest man I have met, he works so hard, his job involves him driving all over the country and he reaps the very much deserved rewards, he’s so ambitious and focused and he is gradually working his way up the ladder at his current company. He is highly valued by them, and I can understand why. Also the work he does on the house is first class, he just knows how to fix anything and I know I am the luckiest girl in the world to have bagged him. 16 years after we first met and we are in as much love now as we were way back then.

So things are pretty rosy right now. Of course there are ups and downs, things happen that aren’t so nice, but as long as we pull tight as a family, we can get through anything.

I’ve wittered for long enough now. Time to get on with some work. Will keep posting updates. (not as long as this one, but I had a lot to put down, for me more than anything.) I have some pieces to drill. Trying to keep on top of things.

The only way is up…..

Having a few up and down days lately, if anyone’s interested. You’re not? Well tough. I have bad PMT, I’m grouchy, and I’ll bloody well moan if I like. Everything I touch is turning to mush lately. People dropping like flies around me, unsuccessful projects,  trying to muster up enthusiasm for NEW projects, but lacking motivation… I was really excited about a craft fair, spent a small fortune on material and displays etc… up late in the evenings pricing everything, only for it to be cancelled the same day. I suppose I will come across this lots, but it really sucked. Really gutted. Getting fed up being away from work so often too. Wishing so much for that blinkin’ furnace to get up to temperature and for the pot to actually survive for once. I miss it in there. I’ll feel like I’m starting all over again when I finally get back in. Wishing Nick wasn’t working so late in the evenings too. I hardly see him during the week. He’s out before I’m awake, in the early hours, then back home sometimes after 8.00pm, where he often has more work to do when he gets in. Then I’m worried about him doing so much travelling. He was 3.5 hours away yesterday, and is the same again today. But he loves it and he’s a grafter, which is what makes me love him more. We really need a break somewhere together alone, instead of me selfishly and impulsively looking to visit various friends, go away to trade fairs etc… I forget how amazingly supportive he can be sometimes. He deserves treating once in a while. I’ve not come across anyone who works as hard as he does. In fact, I think I may even cancel all my plans… Family comes first.

There have been some good days too. I’m not all doom and gloom. I’ve sold quite a bit of jewellery lately, both through work and privately, much more than I have before, so I feel that it is finally coming together a little bit. Nice to finally be making some money from it too!! 😀 My newest pieces are looking more slick, and now I have aqcuired some chunks of silver to melt down, I can look to add a new dynamic to some pieces. Fingers crossed. Thinking I should look to do a silversmithing course first though.. don’t want to waste any.. But it appears more and more people are starting to hear about me, mostly through word of mouth, since I have yet to work out how to go about promoting myself, although help may be at hand there……. 😉

At the moment I am staring at a lump of graphite. I need to turn it into a mould, but it is proving to be an extremely messy process. Last attempt, I looked like a coal miner. I think I might get into trouble for the layer of black over everything tonight… Looks like I’ll have to use my big drill. The one with the extraction on it. The one I never use because it is so big!! Luckily I have drill bits in every shape under the sun, sadly all diamond ones too, so I can see my whole evening spent over a bucket of soapy water brandishing a toothbrush……!!

Well, here’s hoping this temporary dip passes over soon, and by next week or so things will be back on an even keel. 🙂

Back and Refreshed… :)

 

Church Cove near Mullion

Well, had a wonderful week’s break in my beloved Cornwall, with the family, eyeing up possible studios there, beach front of course! Too much inspiration for words! Even Nick was mulling it over with me. Could we just up sticks and start a new life down there, our own gallery, tearoom, studio, maybe run some glass courses too? I’m thinking way ahead, but it is starting to become clearer and clearer, like the tiny little speck on the horizon is now slowly starting to come into view, and I am just sitting daydreaming about it. It’s becoming even more of an obsession right now. I can actually visualise it!! A very contemporary gallery, and funky coffee shop full of beanbags and squishy sofas…  I felt so encouraged to go for it by the other artists down there who make a living quite happily. Spent a lot of time on the beach taking endless photos of the waves, so beautiful, and the inspiration for my next body of work. Came back with lots of other glass related paraphernalia to use too, so can’t wait. Already designing new items.

At the moment I am trying to get organised for craft fairs and markets. I have a couple of imminent ones, so the last couple of days have been fab, getting deliveries through the post of accessories for these. I’ve put the ones further afield on hold for a little while, (except the Christmas one) since I lost my friend who was going to run some for me, due to some major disagreements. Still quite gutted by this, but if ever I needed proof that business and friendship doesn’t mix, then this is it. Hoping it will sort itself out one day, but I’m not holding my breath. Just some advice though, if you really value a friendship and care deeply for someone, then never involve them in your business. It just leads to heartache and tears and you risk losing them for good.. 😦
Anyway, because of this setback, I will be even busier than I had hoped, but I am actually looking forward to travelling around to new places, meeting new people, pulling on my fingerless gloves and becoming a market trader! 😉 The dynamic of the company has changed again, and although I feel quite nervous, I am really excited about new products and new ideas. I have plenty of stock now, and I guess I’ve been digging my heels in for months but now is the time to really let go. Will try and keep a diary on here of my progression. I have never felt more inclined to make this a success. x 🙂

Another Quick Update…

Well, thought it was high time I added to this, not that there has been much happening really. Generally still just trying to get some kind of market or craft stall arranged, although I have a few to choose from now, just all the boring stuff setting up dates, making sure they are suitable, in areas where I actually stand a chance of making some kind of profit. At the minute, I don’t care how small, just testing the water in this early stage. I do have one which is set in stone though. Then will be the hard part. Maybe having to entrust all my work with someone else. Not sure how I am going to react to that if and when the time comes, but we’ll see. Will feel like I’m giving one of my kids away. I don’t trust anyone like I trust myself, so it will be difficult to say the least. I predict a bit of turmoil and disagreements before they are prised from my vice-like grip!!

I’ve also been working on a range of fused glass pictures just lately, which although they still need some tweaking, I am having so much fun with them. These are to sell alongside my pendants, so at least I don’t look like a ‘one trick pony!’ The excitement is still there, everytime I know I have a firing to check. It never gets any less… Saying that, I forgot to put a firing in last night after work, so I’m a bit cross. Will have to wait for Sunday now.

My workload has increased somewhat lately, (apart from this past two weeks of not being in the glasshouse due to furnace issues, back to normal on Monday) so I’m generally working around the clock, (when I’m not crashed out with exhaustion on the sofa!!) just trying to cram in as much as possible. Lately it has been mostly design work for a project which is starting to bother me a little bit… Once I have a decent body of work for this, I will post some pics and all will become clear why I am tearing my hair out……  But generally, I feel shattered, and a little run down. A bit of a bad time for me right now personally speaking, so at least being busy is keeping me occupied. Especially since I made the decision a week ago to try and keep offline as much as I could whilst sorting my head out, which I have pretty much stuck to, and feel a lot better for it too. Apart from using the internet for research purposes, social-networking has all but been forgotten, nearly.. I may pick it up again soon, but it certainly made me realise that my true friends, the ones who really do care are the ones that are with me here. That I can drop in on for coffee and a natter, not the ones who only get in touch via ‘chat’ or who invent a stupid fake persona to hide behind, infront of their screen, because they are too gutless to speak that way to someones face. I don’t fall for ‘bravado’. It bores me. Those are the people I don’t need in my life, that I am not going to waste another single bit of myself on. And believe me… I have discovered a couple lately!

Other news is I am off down to Cornwall for a week shortly. Or ‘home number 2’ as I like to think of it. Well it will be one day. A peaceful week with my lovely hubby and the kids. Can’t wait for sunset walks on the beach, sitting out in the sunshine eating cream-teas, unspoilt countryside with the haunting evidence of it’s past industry dotted around… the adorable Cornish folk… heaven… 🙂 Just won’t want to come home again. I’ll be keeping an eye out for possible galleries and studios. 😉

Well I am not wasting anymore of this weather, I’m going for a walk. Then maybe tonight, get into work for a few hours….

Quick update.. (warning: whingey…)

Well, been quiet on here, haven’t I? Keep forgetting to update so here’s a quick one. Not a lot to report, still just working away on increasing stock levels. I have developed a new technique for adding delicate detail too which I am trying to perfect at the moment, it’s all very exciting, but frustrating because there’s no margin of error temperaturewise whilst firing this.. probably about 10°C, if that. PLUS the fact that certain colours have different melting points, it’s proving quite stressful. Won’t be beat though. This is why it is vital to note down every single thing as you are doing it, we always had it drummed into our heads at uni about the importance of a ‘technical notebook’ and it’s only now I realise how true it is. I have also come up with another idea to run as a sideline with the jewellery which is so much fun, may post a pic later. 🙂

Other news… still have a possible gallery who are interested in the pipeline so fingers crossed and possibly looking to rent a little outlet in the form of a small kiosk or stall, but in a city… I’m a touch pessimistic about this which is unlike me, probably from a financial point of view though, since it’s ME who is the sole investor. I’m not a big risk-taker, and there are many, many questions which I am struggling to find answers to. Probably due to time. I don’t have a lot of time and seem to keep finding more pressing tasks to do. Who knows… maybe, maybe not. It’s not the end of the world if it doesn’t work out. I feel lately like the fun is fading a little, and I really need to get that twinkle back, like it was about 6 months ago. Just a temporary glitch I think. So many personal and professional issues, that’s of no interest to anyone else I suppose. I just feel so under pressure and hassled, when I really shouldn’t, and it’s making me get quite downhearted. What’s frustrating is getting people to LISTEN to me, to try and understand a little bit, but no one listens. At all. I know I sound like I am in serious whining mode today, and maybe I am. This was never, ever to do with making money, it was about creating a brand of sorts, to get some recognition and because I love making glass jewellery. I’m not a business woman, I’m a craftswoman and I find it really difficult to separate the two. I have to make my own mistakes and learn by them. I’m going to have to make some big decisions very soon, but I am going to have to just be selfish and do what I think is right for the business. In the meantime I’m still going after other prospective stockists, regardless and am still pondering over trade fairs. I really need to take some time and visit a few places but with work committments it’s really difficult. Maybe during the summer, although I am down in my second home – Cornwall, in a few weeks, although it’s a supposed to be a summer break, I know I’ll be turning it into a business one!! I may just find my dream property with studio there and just stay!!! I know if I do happen across a place, it will be constantly on my mind when I get back and I know I may end up doing something impulsive… rose-tinted glasses and all.. THAT would put the twinkle back firmly in place….. 🙂